I only seem to rip skirts if they are brown. Weird, right?
During the beginning of summer, when I was riding a bike back from Mass
(something that I have done numerous
times in a skirt), right in the middle of the intersection in front of my old
high school—my skirt got caught in the back tire. And my skirt continued to
wrap around the tire, as I—attached to my bike—hobbled to the sidewalk, to pull
my skirt out. Needless to say, my beautiful, soft brown skirt had huge rips and
tire marks in the back. Well, that happened once, so of course, I would never
be crazy enough to rip a skirt again…so I thought.
Well, a couple weeks ago, I was writing an essay comparing
Coleridge and Blake’s methods of escapism in Romantic poetry (the Romantic
movement, not mushy gushy romantic
poetry), and I was going crazy. I had been writing all day, and I needed a break. I was sitting in the upstairs of
Egan (an academic building) on a couch next to Jacob (he and a classmate were
studying for their Theology midterm), but I jumped up, and skipped towards the
water fountain, doing some flying Irish dance leaps. Rip…. “Shoot, I ripped my skirt.” I had forgotten that this
particular brown skirt had a flowy overskirt, but a narrower underskirt. And
that bottom layer had ripped.
It’s pretty crazy that I would rip my skirt. Not just one
skirt, but two skirts. Not only that,
but they were both brown. Even though
I thought I would never make the same mistake twice, I did. The same holds true
with Latin. During my first semester ever of Latin—on the midterm--I switched
conjugations of my verb, thus missing most of the points on the first page. “Well,”
I thought, “I’m never making that mistake
again.” But of course, what happens one year later, in my third semester of
Latin, on the midterm? I switch verb conjugations. Which plummeted me down so
far that I had to break up with Latin. I even wrote a break-up poem for the
occasion! (It’s the English major in me…) Course withdrawal form in hand, I had
to humble myself to have my teacher sign off on my decision.
It was tough at first for me to come to peace with this
decision. I had made the same mistake two times—just like ripping my brown
skirts. How crazy is that? Think about all of those other people who actually learn from their mistakes! I must be so
much less than them, right? Wrong. We all
fail to learn from our mistakes. It’s called concupiscence. Our tendency—our inclination—to
sin. How many times have we gone into the Confessional—only to restate the sins
that we confessed during our last visit? Come on, we’ve all done it before. We
make the same mistakes multiple times. When Satan finds our weak spot, he tends
to try to use it. So should we just sit and mope in our failure? Should I just
sit and mope about not learning from my Latin mistakes or my skirt-ripping
occasions?
No!
We have to get up and keep going, being at peace with God working
in us. If I don’t want to rip any more brown skirts (or any skirts, for that
matter), then I have to stop jumping and leaping around in skirts that aren’t
made for jumping around in. If I don’t want to make the same mistakes in Latin,
I just have to work harder and more thoroughly at learning the basics. If I
want to eradicate some habitual sins from my life, I need to strengthen those
weak spots in my life. I can’t just sit around and whine about my horrible
failings. I need to be strong. Utilize the sacraments and personal
prayer/devotions, as well as positive practices—to reinforce those areas where
I usually fall. So that I may love others and God more and more!
So right now. Pray, and see one area of your life where you
keep falling down. Find that weak spot where the devil pushes through. Now
determine a specific way that this week, you can reinforce that area of your
life, so as to fight and overcome the temptation, instead of succumbing to the
devil.
Praised be Jesus now and forever!
And, for anyone interested, my “break-up with Latin” poem…
Upon Withdrawing from Wheelock’s Latin
Dedicated to
all students who struggle with Latin.
St. John
Vianney, Pray for us!
St. Joseph
of Cupertino, Pray for us!
When we
first met, I was terrified
But then put
at ease with your kindness,
And the
promise of where we would go
The
afternoon sun would look
Down upon
us, as we sat together for
Hours upon
hours, gazing on each other
You brought
me to new places, showing
Me so much
beauty, bringing me deeper
Friendships
We kept growing
deeper, pulling out
Each other’s
faults, but no true relationship
Is without
imperfection, is it? I was thrilled to
Spend this
time with you, and I joyfully
Anticipated
the places you would take me
The things
that you would teach me
But things
could not be rose-colored and
Full of
sunshine; we had our disagreements,
And we would
get over them. But
When you
went overboard, the tears pressed
Against my
eyeballs, and I fought hard to keep
My composure
in the midst of everyone else
I couldn’t
break down, no, I had to be strong—
Strong like
you always were
It wasn’t
until I was far away from your all-seeing
Presence
that I finally let it get to me; the tears
Flowed out
like raindrops, drenching my face.
My mother’s
voice on the phone consoled me,
My best
friend soothed me, and I began to feel
Peace
washing over my skin like a nice
Warm shower
on a cold night
And that
peace is making me very strong
Like an
athlete lifting weights, I am
Lifting this
up above myself, and out
Of my line
of vision. I had my hopes and my
Dreams, but
you went over the edge; I tried
So hard to
please you, but you just couldn’t
Do the same
for me. You played hardball
With me, now
I’m playing hardball with you
See, I’m
through—it’s over, I’m done for now
I need a
break for a while. We need some space
To think it
out, to pull ourselves together
If we can
both grow up a little more, and get our
Priorities
and commitments in line, then maybe
Who knows?
We might have a future together
In store for
us. But until then, stay away—go fool
Around with
some other unsuspecting girl, maybe
You’ll learn
someday that a relationship is a two
Way street,
and you need to live up your end of the
Bargain and
help the other person out.
So I’m done,
I’m through, I’ve had enough of
You and your
ways, and I’ll spend my days more
Wisely,
profitably, with those who love me much
More than
you ever could. Farewell, I hope you learn
And take
care of yourself, as I put you up there
Back on my
shelf, dear Wheelock’s Latin.
